We be going to Werribee…

“Dylan, stop eating your lip balm!” “Finn, keep your hands to yourself!” “Dada, drive carefu…ARRRGH!!!!” Nothing like the soothing Leahys Holiday Soundtrack – The Greatest Hits.

This school holidays, we ventured to Werribee (just half an hour from Melbourne) for a short visit to stay at historic Werribee Mansion and check out the Werribee Safari Park. Actually, sometimes I wonder why we even go on holiday in Australia (other camping holidays, which are excellent!).

I mean, the hotels are overpriced, generally tacky and understaffed – you pay $500 for a room the size of a box and then you get this….

To paraphrase Jay-Z, niggard please! $6.50 for hand sanitizer in your own hotel bathroom? And who uses hand sanitizer in the bathroom anyway?! Did soap and water go out of fashion? I didn’t get the memo. And don’t get me started about how I rang room service for 20 minutes before I got to order soggy and overpriced fish & chips!

And in Australia, you can pull up to a supposed 5-star hotel, and when you look for the bellboy / porter / doorman please, fuhgeddaboutit. When minimum wage is $19.76 an hour AUD (unskilled at that), you can either carry your own bags, or ask the reception girl for assistance, whereupon she will say “Oh, would you be requiring help with your bags?? (Cue raised eyebrows and thought bubble above her head which reads “Dude, I have arms, you have arms, am I missing something?)

Anyway we did enjoy the gardens and the free range safari style zoo was outstanding. Here are some pictures…

We saw gorgeous gangly giraffes who walked so close to our coach that you could see the mosquito bites on their hides…

Stupendous prehistoric looking rhinos, one of whom attacked our vehicle while the driver yelled “DOWN! BAD RHINO!” as if it were a overenthusiastic Jack Russell rather than a 1,900 kg armoured beast. Finn was too thrilled, we be (or should I say werribee?) too terrified.

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A lovely evening walk in the majestic grounds of the historic Werribee mansion.

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Finn & Dylan playing together these days is a delicate balance – I never know when the screaming and squealing is happiness, hysteria or terror. Sometimes you just have to zen out and ignore the whole thing.

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Darling, I think these gardens would look lovely next to the east wing of our manor!

Sunset arrived swiftly, it was winter after all, and the Irishman slunk off to watch a Lions match in town while I ordered room service and snuggled up with the kids.

Werribee Immabe back again, but for a day trip this time, don’t be holding that hand sanitizer for me!

3 thoughts on “We be going to Werribee…

  1. Gee, I laughed at this post! Had always wondered whether I should tack on a stay at the Mansion when we visit because my girls do love the zoo. After reading this post, I wonder no more! Will persevere with the annoying drive and keep taking my own hand sanitizer!

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